Cartman Gets an Anal Probe EPISODE 1
What Cartman thinks was just a dream, actually happened. The night before Cartman was abducted by aliens and has a satellite going in and out of his ass to prove it. Meanwhile, Kyle has alien problems of his own as his brother Ike, has also been abducted.

Volcano EPISODE 2
While on a hunting trip with Stan's Uncle Jimbo and his war-buddy Ned, the boys learn about a monster named "Skuzzle-butt." Meanwhile, a nearby volcano is giving off signs of eruption.v

Weight Gain 4000 EPISODE 3
Kathie Lee Gifford comes to South Park to present an award to Cartman. Cartman uses Weight Gain 4000 in the hopes of bulking up for the occasion, while Mr. Garrison makes some preparations of his own for Kathie Lee.

Big Gay Al's Big Gay Boat Ride EPISODE 4
The boys learn Stan's dog Sparky is gay. After several attempts to fix Sparky's "problem" fail, Sparky runs away. Stan decides to look for Sparky instead of quarterbacking the South Park Cows in the biggest game of the season.

An Elephant Makes Love to a Pig EPISODE 5
When the boys learn about genetic engineering, Kyle wonders if it would be possible to cross-breed his elephant with Cartman’s pot-bellied pig. The boys enter their experiment in the science fair, but have to compete against the son of Dr. Mephisto, the town’s genetic engineer.

Death EPISODE 6
Stan's grandfather is 102 years old and is begging for someone to kill him. When the boys are accused of attempting to aid Stan's grandpa in his wishes, the blame is put on Terrance & Phillip.

Pink Eye EPISODE 7
When mistakes are made at the morgue, Kenny turns into a zombie. Meanwhile, the town celebrates Halloween with costumes ranging from Chewbacca to Hitler.

Starvin' Marvin EPISODE 8
While watching TV, a commercial featuring Sally Struthers comes on offering a free sports watch with a donation to famine relief. Instead of a watch, the boys receive an Ethiopian boy, who they start calling “Starvin’ Marvin.” When the government learns of the mistake, Cartman is mistakingly sent back to Africa instead of Marvin. Meanwhile, an experiment gone wrong results in mutant turkeys running rampant throughout the town.

Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo EPISODE 9
While practicing the Christmas play, the boys realize that Kyle doesn't celebrate Christmas. Kyle informs the boys that he does celebrate the annual visit of “Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo." Meanwhile, the town of South Park prepares to celebrate a non-offensive Christmas.

Damien EPISODE 10
Damien, the son of Satan is the new kid in South Park. Damien is in town demanding to speak with Jesus on his father’s behalf. Meanwhile, Cartman prepares for his birthday party.

Tom's Rhinoplasty EPISODE 11
Mr. Garrison takes some time off for a surgical procedure and as a result his class gets a beautiful substitute teacher named Ms. Ellen. Wendy becomes jealous when Stan seems to be infatuated with Ms. Ellen. When Ms. Ellen seems to be immune to the charms of Chef he tells the boys that he thinks she is a lesbian and the boys try to become lesbians, so that Ms. Ellen will like them. After Mr. Garrison recovers from his surgery, he looks like David Hasselhoff and quits his teaching job to enjoy all that his new looks provide.

Mecha-Streisand EPISODE 12
At an archaeological dig, Kyle picks up a triangle that Cartman has discarded. Media attention from the find attracts Barbra Streisand, who needs the triangle to complete “The Diamond of Pantios.” When she completes the diamond, she turns into a terrible monster that will require the combined efforts of Leonard Maltin, Sidney Poitier and The Cure’s Robert Smith to defeat her.

Cartman's Mom is a Dirty Slut (1) EPISODE 13
Cartman wants to know who his father is, but his mother isn’t much help as he discovers that she’s had numerous relations with the men of South Park during the night of "The Drunken Barn Dance." Meanwhile, Kyle and Stan enter a videotape they made of Cartman holding a tea party with stuffed animals in the weekly contest held by America’s Stupidest Home Videos.